NORTH POST

Flashback Monday, where we look back at a 21-year old in the initial throes of a five-year obsession with The Pogues...

North Song

Nap while the church doors are swinging

And hell will well-stain your tide. Amen!

Be at peace while the church bells are ringing, 

And you'll never be active again.

Oh, a star it might shake in the north sky,

A star it might shake in the north,

But I'll never get down 

On my knees on the ground

Where another was driven away.

Follow your love on a Sunday

To romp on a lawn in the country air,

And you'll follow her down on a Monday

And rot in a corner right with her.

A star it might shake in the north sky,

A star it might shake in the north,

But I'll never get down

On my knees on the ground

Where another was driven away.

Oh, I must have been christened in soda,

Since I can't be kept down in a pew, 

And I live my life like I oughta,

Not like some fucking priest on the screw.

A star it might shake in the north sky,

A star it might shake in the north,

But I'll never get down

On my knees on the ground 

Where another was driven away.

CHK

Wait, Panic at the Disco dropped the exclamation from their name?

I haven't been this shaken up since Matchbox 20 became matchbox twenty...

MAC DADDY

So, within minutes of opening up my new Mac, I was on the phone with Northern Virginia Pest and Small Animal Control (or NOVA PSAC, more familiarly)…

ST: Um, hi. I have a bit of a problem here. I just bought a new MacBook…
NOVA PSAC: Feist?
ST: Huh? How…
NOVA PSAC: It’s Feist, again, isn’t it? We here at PSAC have been dealing with this for almost a year now. We see it three, four times a week. What is she doing, sir?
ST: Now? Now she’s just kind of squatting in the corner. But she was floating around the room just before. We have a cathedral ceiling, so she was really up there…
NOVA PSAC: Dammit, man—not a cathedral ceiling. That’s where your most persistent Feist infestations take root. So, she’s not mobile now. Is she making any sound?
ST: Hold on. OK. OK. Yeah. She’s counting. Just “1,2,3,4” over and over again. Please tell me you can make this stop. In the name of all that is good and right, please…
NOVA PSAC: OK, sir, hold on. Don’t get hysterical. We here at PSAC are trained professionals. We’ll take care of this. Is she blocking your way?
ST: No, no, she’s still over in the corner of the room.
NOVA PSAC: Excellent. Here’s what you need to do: Go into another room, preferably the largest available room in the house. Next, you’re going to need to form a Canadian supergroup collective. I’d recommend you get one of the violin players from Arcade Fire and one of the dudes from Stars, to start. Who knows, that might even be enough.

So I did just that, and then sent them on a tour of 750-seat clubs, mostly out west. And all of my Feist problems were solved.

Thank you, PSAC, from the bottom of my heart!

CORE A APPLE

Broke down and bought a Mac. Now begins the transfer of files from the HP.

And if Feist starts bounding about my living room while I'm trying to work, frankly I'm going to be a little pissed...

SOME KIND OF WONDERFUL

Fun facts about Urban Voodoo Machine, who opened for the Pogues:

-It is the year 2008, and they call themselves "Urban Voodoo Machine." By choice, apparently.
-One of them used to be in Flesh for Lulu. Isn't that nice, like Miami Vice?
-They transgressed all rules of opening-band decorum by playing for about 12 hours. Tighten it up a bit lads, 'K?

We're spring breaking around here-- be back late next week.

DEAD OLD TREES

Shane did not seem any more or less coherent than the last time around.

He again relied on the set list taped to the stage in an effort to follow along, and sometimes he needed Spider to correct his song announcements:

“This is Body of an American.”
“No Shane, we just did that.”

But then you hear the lyrics to Dark Streets of London (“And every time that I look on the first day of summer/Takes me back to the place where they gave ECT”), and you think a little harder about the journey from electroconvulsive therapy to this stage on this night...

TO HELL, WHICH IS CIRCULAR ALL AROUND

Different vibe at this Pogues show than there was back in 2006. I wouldn’t say it was subdued, but it was relatively laid back.

The crowd on the floor back in 2006 looked like white water—it rose and fell and chucked and sprayed.

This time around, the floor was marked by a few enthusiasts, but nothing too aggressive.

Telling quote, from Dude #1 to Dude #2, re Dude #3, directly in front of us upstairs: “I promised his wife I wouldn’t let him go down on the floor.”

WHERE THE RIVERS ALL RUN DRY

So brain coral and I are heading out to see The Pogues again.

I have to say, I don’t feel like we’re tempting fate. We got our grace last time, sitting like a big, fat whole note on the staff.

I am prepared now, I think, to have some good uncomplicated fun…

DETOX

During the course of work today, this phrase jumped out at me: “liver regeneration.”

I thought about how my mother willed my father’s body to science after he died at 46, so that further research could be done on his cirrhotic liver.

I thought about how my brother benefited from that research when he got his liver transplant 17 years later. Still, he didn't make it to 33.

Then I thought about Shane MacGowan, who just turned 50 this past Christmas day.

Liver regeneration.

Huh…

WON'T YOU LET ME TAKE YOU ON A SEA CRUISE?

Dear Royal Caribbean Cruise Lines,

Just an FYI that contrary to the information in the address field for all the mail you keep sending me, my name is not in fact “Dong Park.”

Close, but not quite.

However, if I do go through with my tentative plans to become a Korean porn star, it’s good to know that I have a nom de smut waiting for me.

Regards,
sliced tongue